Goodtime Slim...
by Alan Smithee
Summary: Part two of my revamp of my current fics to a more pleasing style. Re-read them and see about this.


Chapter Two: "Goodtime Slim, Uncle Doobie, and the Great Frisco Freakout."  
  
The four heroes headed to their new headquarters. They found it was a nicely-sized skyscraper around Second City. They later had found out that it used to be one of the tallest buildings in the United States until the population explosion made them need to make virtually all buildings in the thousand-foot range.  
"They got us this place? It's so...small!" Time Warp said.  
"Yeah, and it's a little far from Metropolis. How do we get there in time for things they'd need us for?" Brisk said.  
"Don't sweat this stuff. We'll get a better place sooner or later. Besides, this one will probably work for us. I mean, what other place will give us all these floors to play with?" Deluge replied.  
"Yeah. It's just a test. We'll handle it," Boombastic replied.  
"Well, we'd better start our work." Brisk checked out the computer. The computer was a Legion hand-me-down and had a link-up to their network so that they could go for any missions. Brisk sat down, checked his e-mail, and prepared to head on to a hip E/N site before he was stopped.  
"The LegionNET user SGirl777 has send you an Instant Message. Do you accept?" Brisk clicked on "No." The computer replied: "Our circuits have identified SGirl777 as the leader of the Legion. If you do not reply, you will be terminated on LegionNET." Brisk clicked on yes and was greeted by the message.  
"You guys had BEST get over here ASAP. We have an urgent mission," Saturn Girl said. Brisk quickly called for his team. Once they were assembled, the four headed over to the Legion HQ.   
  
"We're here. Whaddaya want?" Brisk replied.  
"We have to get to Rebok immediately. Here, watch the Headquarters. We've gotten you a new recruit, so initiate him," Saturn Girl ordered. The Legionnaires left. The team found the recruit over in front of the Legion's entertainment center.  
"Hi. What's your deal?" Brisk asked.  
"AAAYYYYYYY!" the recruit replied.  
"Um, he wants to know what your style of work is so you may join this refuge of the damned," Time Warp tried to explain. He too was greeted with an "AAAYYYYYYYY!"   
"Hold up. I might have something." Deluge told the recruit "BIZZKIT!" He as well was greeted with an "AAAAYYYYYY!"   
"You guys are just amateurs. I know his M.O." Boombastic headed over to the recruit. "AAAYYYYYY!" The recruit replied with another "AAAYYYYYYY!" Boombastic asked "WASSUP!" The recuit replied in kind. Boombastic tried saying "WHOOOO!" and had the recruit reply "Not well."  
"How did you do that?" Brisk asked.  
"Simple. S.W.O. gives all of its operatives some materials to pass through undetected with the people. You know, fully silent weaponry, armors with templates for every known alien race, and of course, a Universal BabelFish hookup that will instantly translate any known language and vice versa. I just kept my stuff." Boombastic turned to the recruit. "WASSUP?" The recruit replied "BEEAAA!" Boombastic turned to his teammates. "That's Rydellian for "I would like a cup of tea." Brisk quickly went and got the recruit a cup of tea. The recruit drank it slowly.   
"Ah, there it goes." The recruit said.  
"How'd you do that?" Deluge asked.  
"It goes with my power. You'll hear about it. My name's closest Interlac translation is Steve Williamson. I go by the code name of Bender. As you deducted, I do come from Rydel. Had a typical time there, you know, race fast cars, go to fast food parlors to hang out, the like. Basically, like a '50s retro sitcom. Actually, that's how most of my origin came forward."  
"Go on?" Time Warp replied.  
"Basically, I was trying to jump 100 garbage cans on my motorcycle to settle a bet. I jumped the cans and won the 100 creds, but I put too much gas into it. I overshot them and took out the official Miracle Machine for the capital city of Suco. Apparently, someone in the government was using poor quality tea for it, so my motorcycle's gas mixed with small amounts of my own blood was enough for it to turn myself into a living Miracle Machine. That's why I needed the tea, so that I could work out the probability of learning fluent Interlac in the span of a couple seconds," Bender said.  
"Cool. So what do we do now?" Deluge asked.  
"I hear that there's a Happy Days marathon on 20th TV," Bender replied. The five heroes sat down and watched the episodes. Suddenly, they got a call.  
"CAN YOU GUYS GET TO REBOK ASAP?" Saturn Girl hysterically screamed.  
"Why?" Brisk asked.  
"There's six Hypertime villains who are screwing nass up. We need all the help we can get."   
"We'll send three people so that two of us are watching this place." Brisk replied. The five decided to use the time honored tradition of their ancestors to decide: "Rock-Scissors-Paper."  
  
"Okay. SHOOT!"   
"YES! No Paper! I stay!" Boombastic exclaimed.  
"Sorry, Shane, mine is an, um, Atomic Bomb! Yeah. Your rock is vapor..." Brisk said. Boombastic tried to whine about the rules. "Sorry, but I'm the leader. I say what version of Rock-Scissors-Paper we use."   
"I take it my scissors is gone too?" Time Warp said.  
"Yours were broken before detonation." Brisk said.  
"Luckily, I put on the Lead Suit. I RULE!" Bender said.  
"Sorry, IIP induced choices don't count. Motor."  
"DAMMIT!" Boombastic, Time Warp, and Bender headed over to the cruiser.  
"I call Driver!" Boombastic said.   
"I have Shotgun!" Bender quickly called. The three piled into the cruiser. Bender put in a tape.  
"Oh, crap, this isn't old Rydellian 'HALLA HALLA HALLA' music, is it?" Time Warp asked.  
"Of course not. It's sane music."  
The cruiser sped off. Within a couple hours, they got to Rebok.  
"AAAYYYYYY!" Bender exclaimed.   
"Darn. His tea wore off. Well, let's look for the team." The three looked around until they saw the Legionnaires crumpled in a heap of bodies.  
"Crud. Well, this looks like a job for Stefan..." Boombastic replied.  
"Excellent. LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!" Time Warp grabbed Bender and Boombastic as all three went back to the time of the fight.   
"You guys got here! Thank Valor!" Saturn Girl exclaimed.  
"Where's the bad guy?" Boombastic asked. Saturn Girl pointed to Brainiac 5.1. Brainy proceeded to put a force field on Saturn Girl's head, slowly smothering her.   
"NOOOOO!" Bender quickly poured himself a cup of tea and drank. Within seconds, the force field was around 5.1. Boombastic used the window and put his hands into a gun motion. "SMOKE THIS MOTHERFUCKER LIKE IT AIN'T NO THANG!" Within seconds, a series of moderately-sized green fireballs went toward Brainiac 5.1, stunning him. Bender proceeded to hold up 5.1's legs as Time Warp started flying around the top.  
"WASSUP!" Bender cried as Time Warp jumped down and threw his head at 5.1's crotch. The three picked up Brainiac and threw him into a Space Anomaly near the planet. They then proceeded to leave and head back to Legion HQ.  
  
"WHO'S HOUSE?" Time Warp yelled.  
"RUN'S HOUSE!" Boombastic and Bender responded.  
"I SAID A WHO'S HOUSE?"  
"RUN'S HOUSE!" The three met up with Deluge and Brisk.  
"So, how'd you do?" Brisk asked.  
"We saved the big squad's asses!" Boombastic replied.  
"Well, we got some good stuff as well." Brisk replied.  
"What happened?"   
"We were accepted into the Science Police. We tendered our resignations as Subs."  
  
End Chapter Two. 


End file.
